The question "Who Am I?" is a question that all mankind have asked. Period. I am not the only person to ask this question, at least that's what I have to keep telling myself. This is a question that only one being can answer. Your Creator. Just like we humans tend to immulate in music, the meaning of the piece can be interpreted in many different ways. The truest insight into the ebb and flow of the music can only be decided upon by its composer. And so to answer this question, I turn to The Composer and ask this. "Who is it that you want me to be? Dear Potter, what am I to look like in your eyes? What is the shape and attitude of this vessel?"
A friend of mine once said that when I am being who I am truely meant to be, those that are meant to be in my life will be there. Is that true of everything in my life? If I am truely being the designed vessel, wholly and purely, will my life be as it is meant to be BASED on that? Is my self-assurance in who I am IN CHRIST the fuel of my life? Is that truely the way to being in God's will?
I believe it is. It just makes sense. This is a magnificent equation. Just like with spiritual gifts, they first of all come naturally. When I am in Christ and in the Spirit, these natural gifts are infused with the Holy Spirit, giving them power. When my gifts are used correctly and powerfully, the glory is God's (whether I choose to acknowledge that fact or not) and just like Jacob, the gifts have a new name and a new purpose. They become Spiritual Gifts and their purpose is to point the giftee to God. The same is true of our personalities. From the time we are born, we perceive things a certain way, we develop traits, we have our own talents each is his/her own capacity - thus personality (our soul). When we are filled with The Spirit, our personality then becomes infused, our soul becomes infused. When we walk In Christ, without putting on heirs, without even trying, we are being used - if we dare to let The Spirit creep into our personalities!! - as living, breathing, vessels. Our souls then belong to Him. The recipient of the blessing that we can be as just ourselves is then pointed to the Most High, thus giving Him glory.
My question is that of my soul, my realness, my personality, me being me in Christ. Does my soul and its willingness to stay aligned with who The Potter would have me to be direct my path? Does that very thing fuel my existence, the ebb and flow of my life's harmonies, the people I meet, the choices I make?
I think that it does. Without me being me, I wouldn't go the places I go or have the job I do or make my choices the way I make them, have the friends I have, or even wear the clothes that I do. I never realized how much that mattered. If I truely desire a realness with God and a realness with people, I first have to embrace the gifts, talents, and personality that God gave me. For my steps to be ordered, I need direction. I'm not saying that I am my own direction, I'm saying that when I embrace who God has made me, my life will make sense and will flow. But I seek FIRST HIS righteousness. I seek, I desire, I want after what He wants. I search for who He is and who He wants me to be FIRST OF ALL, before anything else. Because how can I know who I am if I do not know whom I serve? He, the Maker of All Things, knows me. He knows who He wants me to be. Friends I am far from it, but I desire it. The best way to be as close to Him as possible (this side of heaven) is to just be me. It really all comes down to my willingness to be who I am intended to be instead who I wish I was.
The equation:
1. God created me with a specific purpose in mind, being born with all the tools I need (whether already there or set in motion to be there when I need them)
2. I seek God, My Creator
3. I realize the differences between me and all other people, in a world of cloned robots
4. I make the choice to seek God despite the world
5. I find myself living
6. I realize that by being myself, I point people to God because they see something of Him in me
7. the previous revelation ignites a deeper love for My Dear One, bringing me closer to Him (and the closer I am to The Light, the harder it is to hide my flaws, as with anything brought into light)
8. He shapes me and molds me, kneeding out the imperfections
9. I see new differences between me and the world, deeper differences
10. I make the choice to seek God, despite the weird looks from people
11. I find myself living
12. I realize, again, that this new depth is beautiful and affects people around me
13. The previous revelation ignites an indescribable joy and brings me to the Throne Room, into His glorious light!
...and so the cycle continues
it is a magnificent equation
Your takehome challenges from these thoughts:
This isn't an excuse. "Just being myself" is no reason to sit around and wait on things to happen. Life must be lived, not watched. The Good Lord gives us tools in being ourselves that we must pick up before they can be used. What good is a hammer if there is no hand to hold it? The honey-do list is long, but the hammerers are few, and I seriously doubt that "waiting on God" will get those things marked off that divine list. There are just some things you don't need to pray about. He gives you things to do, you can READ that list. Pick up your hammer and start swinging before He brings in a rookie to take that blessing when it should've been you! Being obedient is something that ALL His children should be doing, not just the naturally assertive.
And keep in mind that The Potter is always working you with His hand. If he sees that instead of a bowl, you should be a vase, then He will collapse the bowl-shape vessel and begin molding you into a vase (Jer. 18). He sees that, although you might be able to work as a bowl, you would be a magnificent vase. In order to get you there, He might have to mash you up and start all over. John 15 calls that "pruning". Pruning HURTS. But it's okay, because you will bear more fruit and do so more beautifully if you will trust The Gardener. The Rose from which you are measured is a tough standard to live up to, but we have an expert Gardener pruning and cutting away at us. Let Him uses his divine shears on you (The Word) to make you the best you can possibly be - for His sake.
